I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
My kindergarten teacher served me... All coming full circle
In order of importance: Where am I? Where's my car? Where are my clothes? Who is this chick in the room?
Anne's couch, the bar, your car, Anne.
Why have her stay eight hours when I only last eight minutes?
My roommate took my designated hickey removing spoon out of the freezer.
Zach is always passed out on the floor somewhere.face down in a puddle of his own absurdity
I woke up naked wrapped in my roommate's towel with one leg shaved and money thrown all over the room. Happy 21st birthday.
That's the kind of activity you can only get away with by wearing a lion codpiece
The other guys kept waking up so I hid... Like, dick in mouth, hiding in his sleeping bag
When i said i was brazilian i swear to god he started to tear up
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
that was the most beautifully crafted sentence ive ever read that involved the phrase "genitals or whatever"
I'm like bob the builder except I'm fixing boners.
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Randomize
