I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
on the way to work, i saw an empty wine bottle sitting in the middle of an intersection. i thought of you.
i can respect that.
I think I would be able to remember how to smoke but I can't seem to remember how to breathe.
Defiantly just threw away our yearly bottle collection in front of the campus tour. The school should pay me for recruitment
She just left after she spent the past 2.5 hours fuckin the shit out of me. I'll put that in the logbook as a cross country
Do you remember calling yourself Captain Cockblock and openly giving out everyones sexual history? Because you did.
I dont think that yelling at the medic "Christmas is gone, fuck off santa" was the best idea when you couldnt feel your legs.
Mid way while flirting with this super hot chick at the bar, he gets up and says no thanks I'm only 19 and gay just waiting for my buddy to hurry up and get with your friend.
he has to serve us drink and appetizers in his french maid costume for the Pirates game tonight. Bring everyone.
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
I went to an 8am hookup in another guys sweatpants. Who is the really player here?
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
Thanks a lot dude. I'm grateful to you for your gift of pure piss.
you ate an entire watermelon by using a CD as a spoon, then proceeded to chuck the leftovers at some dudes car...
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