He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
Just saw a picture of your new tub, cant wait to pee in it
Woke up this morning to my mom on the phone with my dad saying, "It's probably just your prostate." Reasons to move out. Go.
Just to give you a heads up, I am going home with your ex-boyfriend.... You can't be mad because he was my ex-boyfriend first
We got baked and watched the cheetah girls on Netflix
You need to not admit that.
Let's drink?
Just because it's bacon vodka doesn't mean it's for breakfast.
I seriously just drove by a man walking down the street wearing hospital scrubs, an 80s track jacket, gold necklace and carrying a flute.
I spent most of my night in the men's room eating popcorn on the garbage can conversing with strangers pissing
Vasectomy results are in. No swimmers in the water. REPEAT. No swimmers in the water. Come help me harness my new found super-power
I had my first "Damn Kids/When I Was That Age" rant at work today. We need to drink this feeling out of me. NOW.
ive started thanking my toys after masturbating. might be time to get some fuck boys
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
just woke up with nickles taped to my body. theres like a dollar worth.
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
You’ll (maybe) appreciate that I picked at my ingrown hair again. Quarantine updates are getting BLEAK.
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