I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
Just called my mom. She definitely saw all those fb statuses so thanks for that.
Haha did she know what fisting meant?
Yeah. Which is upsetting in itself
I bought a fake diamond ring to wear, not only to bars to keep the creeps away, but so that I'll be judged less by the front desk girl at Planned Parenthood
I just had sex in a cardigan. Made me feel old. Smarter somehow, but old.
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
Can't decide which I like more. Telling a girl she's pregnant or telling her she has herpes. It's the little things that make medicine tolerable.
looking at my texts from you makes me want to throw up in my pants
I created a photogrid for every picture he has ever sent me of his penis. Now I can see every angle at one time. THIS IS GREAT.
i dont know how he's 22 and thinks emoticons will get him laid. lady boner just died.
I'm your Election Erection Connection
I retroactively revoke all sex we've ever had.
My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck.
I'm disgusted with myself. I feel like I need 10 boxes of Summer's Eve and a baptism.
Well. We had sex and then watched 6 episodes of Dateline NBC together; only breaking the silence to make disapproving noises at shotty police work. So basically yea I'm gonna marry him.
That portable toilet under the bed? Turns out it was a tuba. Explains alot.
I just want to find somebody intelligent enough to trick my parents into thinking she's not a trophy wife. Is that too much to ask?
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