I used a bag of wine as a pillow last night.
Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
She fell onto my light and broke all four plants. I don't care how good the blowjob was.
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
my neighbors garage sale is really cutting into the time of day when i can smoke weed on my deck.
started to yawn and threw up hamburger helper instead. awesome night.
I still cannot believe I yelled at every guy at the bar "you wanna get in this clam?!"
Hahaha alright after 5 shots I'm not allowed to touch glass or boys with girlfriends.
I've created a drink called, "watching the sound of music with grandma." its straight vodka
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
Just wanted to say a big ole FUCK YOU for coming out to mom the day before I have to drive with her for 6 hours. Ass hat.
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
Cockblock successful. That's for pouring nacho cheese on my flatscreen, asshole.
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