Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
My grandma put hard boiled eggs on her lasagna. I'm not high enough for this.
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
My neighbor just watched me eat a granola bar without pants, this is a whole new level of unemployed
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
Also what is the name of Americas thing where we had a holy obligation to expand westward? I'm going name my new lighter that.
Her boyfriend caught us fucking and said "cool you're cheating too" and left.
You live a charmed life.
it was her dad's 50th birthday kegger. Within the first 5 minutes I got punched in the ear from an off-duty cop and smoked a joint the size of my vibrator.
oh yeah, and she got boxed-out by said cop. Then her dad turned around and high-fived him for it
Are you on your way? Get your date and black out with me. Democracy's at stake.
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
Fuck you. Leave my nipples out of this. THEY DID NOTHING TO YOU
I just had to ask my drug dealer to "keep it simple for me". Is this a new low?
We've done worse things
Omfg I just White Claw shamed a Girl Scout Cookie mom and I feel SO BAD.
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