Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
He just kept yelling woof and then threw money all over me...
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
We had a long talk in which he told me he respects me more than any other girl. 30 minutes later, I got a facial.
I apparently texted him "since you're taking time out to think about us. You probably need to think about me getting arrested right now."
Can't. I took a Viagra to make sure I wouldnt leave the room so I might actually study.
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
You know just a typical night. Eating peanut butter off of tablespoons and having sex to our favorite Christmas carols. This is my favorite time of year.
Now I have to go back and sober fuck him. For science.
I just started an apology with "so I'm sorry about throwing the Brita at your head last night..."
My boobs look fucktastic, I have a booty call on Sunday and a dick photo on my phone. Life is grand!
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
On a scale of having tea with Ghandi to the apocalypse how bad of an idea is it to drink with a 100 degree fever?
Randomize
