Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
There are just some things I refuse to put in my mouth.
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
I woke up to a bag of pies and a lot of questions
Why am I the only one concerned that there's a dog in the movie theatre?
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
Fucking finally I'm about to die from sobriety over here
He said I looked like a ballsack and I tried to choke him out with my Ghostbusters pajama pants. Happy fucking Halloween.
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
He literally just peed in a trash can in our room. It didn't even have a bag in it
The highlight was when a stranger was nose to nose with you threatening to kick ur ass, and you said "Is that your real face? Stopped him dead.
And the sexual frustration is like I'm wearing a damn horcrux
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
Also I think I set a new personal record. Definitely slept with him less than 45 minutes after meeting him. Oh god my life.
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