I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
watching espn. realized that the exact place those sportcenter guys are is where I got laid on the beach last superbowl. my sex spot is broadcasted nationwide
47 days without vaginal penetration. Im pretty sure it's grown over.
Do you realize that if your cunt was a missing person it would be assumed dead?
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
Worst luck of my entire life. Came in my own mouth
I played ping pong,drunk, with my hand instead of the paddle. And i won. I have hidden talents
I wish i could just live off of margaritas and good sex.
She's opening her family birthday cards at the bar. So we can pay our tab. Bitches wrote checks :(
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
I never thought the most recent texts on my phone would be with ASAP ferg and my ex...
I just realized how terrible that was... I was drumming on your penis to a song about Baby Jesus.
How exactly does a handjob become fancy?
Blueberry lube, and champagne.
did you know that sneaking into a golf course at midnight is a felony? the cop made sure to tell us after she peed on the course and hit on him
Really should've known 2020 was gonna suck when the guy dressed as baby new year got arrested at our party 5 past midnight...
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