He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
will power is for people who don't want to get laid
it's like, God thought about making her pretty then changed his mind at the last second
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
She left me a voicemail too. It's just her moaning her name repeatedly
We talk about tequila and blow jobs the way that normal people talk about the news and the weather.
i think i swapped my keys for drugs last night
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
Look if 10 am was too early to go barrel tasting the winery would not be open.
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
And then, I saw the prophecy come to fruition. It was the Dick of Destiny.
There is a chick wearing some guy's shirt wrapped around her waist as a skirt... She's flashing her panties to everyone as she sings karaoke. You need to get here.
Don't you hate falling asleep on the couch with a glass of wine in your hand? It's like dreaming about peeing and then realizing you've peed the bed only stickier.
You told his date she had the tits to be a stripper and the personality to be the pole. Of course he's pissed off.
Randomize
