Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
shut up. I wear heels bigger than your dick
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
Okay. Did anyone see me spend $1600 at the strip club last night? Or is this someone else's receipt in my pocket?
In the memo line of the check she wrote sexual healing.
All of our toilets in my house are broken. Thank God I've practiced peeing in the sink enough.
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
time for you to cut the loving, understanding, non-judgmental crap and say/do whatever it takes to make sure I never, ever, ever sleep with him again ever
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
This guy keeps going off in the metal detector. When is it appropriate for me to punch him in the throat just in case?
I can count on one hand the number of good things that happened over the past year.
No actually you're a pro. You puked on the cab ride, and managed to completely contain it in your purse. the cabbie was even impressed.
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
It was like mission impossible.
but with sex.
Randomize
