And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
Did you draw a mustache on my drivers license picture??
I like how my family gatherings are basically an ugly sweater party just with better beer and wine...
i just lost my virginity over my 3 hour lunch break..
u hav a 3 hour lunch break?!
i like how the length of my lunch break is the thing that phases u
You rubbed your penis on my leg and said "people have paid for this kind of action"
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
My garbage can has nothing in it besides condoms and candy wrappers. That's good garbage.
This is literally engraved into my seat "Need crack?" And then there's a number. This isn't real.
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
she said she wouldn't go home with me until she looked up my name in her sex offender app. do i really give off that vibe?
Yeah. It's not just the beard either.
My dad just accidentally taught me how to make fake IDs. I love my life.
like every night i go out someone always suggests nipple hugs so that's why I always end up topless
I panicked i brought burritos. Funeral burritos
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
Randomize
