The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
Fucking Canada. At least when they wake up tomorrow they're still in Canada
Your dad's facebook is ejaculating midlife crisis all over my minifeed
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
just tried to pee in the sink at wendys...need to stop letting my drunk habits get into my sober life
i think he just broke into a bike shop his last text said something about hiding in some tree
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
Drunk logic "let's go outside in front of the bar to get sick"
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
I just spilled a shot of Patron on your mom.. Body shots may be happening. You better get here quick.
For whatever reason, whenever she's drunk off Crown, all she wants to do is jerk me off with her feet.
The stall at this bar had mirrors all around. I just looked at myself take a shit from like 3 different angles
I think I'm so comfortable in my sexual relationship because he mostly wants to see me naked with large plates of bacon tastefully placed upon my body
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
Randomize
