her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
life lesson# 3: saying thank you on a subway really means "im not a native new yorker, so please feel free to touch my ass"
hmm. interesting. explain how you came across this knowledge.
i sneezed. he said bless you. i said thank you. he groped. i again said thank you.
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
I've never seen the starbucks guy more terrified than when you dove out the car window after your credit card
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
We need a fire pit. Meat. And a keg.I mean like a cow we just carve from. And cook it. We can use the milk from the udder to make White Russians
My heart feels like a grape in a barrel about to be crushed into wine
Giving the guy pizza was a good idea. Leaving him naked on the pool table makes you my hero
No no this isn't that fun. I'm alone drinking wine and me and the dogs ran out of things to talk about around 9 am.
Apparently i tried to feed this guy's piranhas my whole left arm.. according to him, i was "showing them whos boss, bc if they try to eat my arm, im guna punch their face"
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
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