Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
so my bro's bff came over...we had an awkward "yeah we fucked and can fuck later, but let's just pretend it didn't happen in front of the family" hug.
The last thing I remember is you asking me how to grow french fries.
Also you were throwing your phone yelling this is durable as shit
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
3 guesses about who had to still-drunkenly facilitate a fire drill at 2:40am because freshmen can't handle microwave popcorn.
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
Eating this pizza pocket is like eating out god
Halfway through he got an idea for a short story so he wrote it in magic marker on my boobs. Yeah, he's a keeper.
I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen
My little brother found me on Instagram. If I'm not already the shame of my family, I'm about to be.
You kept insisting you found queso that's better than oral sex
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
Randomize
