You should be grateful to be my roommate. My booty calls always drive you places in the morning.
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
She is high at the bar - she thinks the bottle of frangelico is aunt jemima telling her to stop doing drugs.
I really hope you are not drunk feeding a raccoon.
The less fucks you give, the more fucks you get. Kinda like "a penny saved is a penny earned" but with vagina.
Finally washing the shoe scuff marks off my front windshield :( bye bye memories
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
You know in a few years she's gonna look like her mom. So if you're gonna hit that you better do it while she still looks like somebody else.
I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...
Handcuffed our DD to a naked stripper don't think he will try to sneak out
He can pick locks you know
That's the reason for the naked stripper
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
the girl who hid my weed when the cops came has a birthday coming up. i feel like i should get her something.
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