So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
I have no idea who these bands are he's listening to. If his current playlist was a pandora station, however, it would be titled "music for closet cock gobblers"
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
If I was doing exactly what I wanted right now I would be getting fucked on a jet ski while listening to "When Love Takes Over" by Kelly Rowland while eating french fries.
she added me on facebook and her celebrity doppelganger is rosie odonnel. FUCK
Having drunken flash backs of me giving you a piggy back ride. I was like Jesus, and you were my cross. I fell so many times for you. This is true friendship.
I've eaten cheese dip for three consecutive meals. I think I need to branch out.
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
I have three different pairs of earrings at three different houses including your 16 year old brothers nightstand. Look at my life. Look at my choices
No no no he wouldn't talk to me before I showed his best friend how good I am at twerking
After you finished the $300 bottle of wine you just started crying about how if Mulder and Scully didn't invite you to join the x-files your life would be meaningless because you "love that weird shit"
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
Your Vodka Saturday privileges have been reduced to Beer until you go a full month without losing an article of clothing.
Your penis is the destroyer of worlds.
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