This girl is more easily done than said...
As I was puking last night I told them "it's ok I'm a paramedic"
I do not want to touch your penis after this conversation.
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
I've gotta stop getting kicked out of bars for fighting with people over the accuracy of the Harry Potter movie.
My vagina is trying to run away to Boston without me.
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
Just as I was applauding myself for the best wing man award, I realized we are going to have to burn our futon.
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
Just so you know, if I get bored tomorrow I WILL pretend to get drunk in the bathroom and crash the whole thing
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
We did Irish Car Bombs out of butter trays, the influence of the retired community is astounding- I didn't know people even owned more than one butter tray.
When you sleep in the bathroom, you're no longer a guest.
What was the name of that sleazy asshole I'm not allowed to sleep with?
Randomize