Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
I swear to god Kristen, if this "cute" guy you are trying to hook up with's friend asks me if we can role play, and I play his mother one more time, Im leaving. You have 3 minutes to save me or I am out.
Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
It saddens me that girls will never know the wonder feeling of pulling your sweaty nutsack off of your leg.
Just tried to put my sweatpants on backwards...the chances of passing my physics exam just went down about 100%.
He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
She said I was the most selfish person in bed she's ever been with and she's fucked Tucker Max.
You know what, I don't care that I got too drunk and didn't make it into the boat party. If I had, I probably wouldn't have peed on you later while we soundly slept. I feel you need that in a best friendship.
While you were hooking up with her I pulled you off to make sure you knew what you were doing.
You said you were "testing the product for Chris."
I'm a bad man.
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
Turns out the bartender I fucked is the bar owner. WHY THE FUCK DO I PAY FOR HALF MY DRINKS? IS SEX NOT TIP ENOUGH?
Point in my hangover when I'm honestly not sure if I'm about to puke, or shit my pants.
Randomize
