Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
so i woke up.. still drunk and discovered my roommate in the living room passed out dick-in-hand watching porn..
What did u do?
turned the porn up and opened the windows so everybody goin to class could see him..
Right before he passed out, he said "Stuporman, coming in for a landing"
Nicee. Atleast your phone doesn't change pen in to PENISsSSSSSSS like mine does
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
before we left she put a post-it on the floor next to the toilet saying she was a pretty pretty princess
Some idiot from high school is in the hospital for bonging three beers up his ass
He should have died. Natural selection.
so my mom thinks I'm picking you up just to go buy you liquor before you go back to school tomorrow...
I'm ashamed that your mom thinks I haven't already taken care of that.
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
We just don't discuss our relationships. It's pretty much like we're single no matter what to each other. And I'm okay with that. ¯\\(ツ)/¯
I jammed my finger giving him a hand job. Don't ask how, I'm still trying to figure that out.
Just so you know. And I'm telling you this because I care deeply for you. Blue raspberry poptarts taste exactly the same as the regular raspberry ones.
After finding out he was married when we were together, I don't trust him.
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
Randomize
