If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
the jolly green giant just puched the pope. halloween is the best.
Couple in the hotel room next to me keep fucking. When I hear her get close I call the room wait for them to stop and hang up. If I'm not getting any tonight then no one should.
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
You picked up her frozen vom puddle and threw it like a frisbee.
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
Is this like a "I'm taking you out to dinner and treating you with respect" kind of date, or is this a "I'm gonna fill you with alcohol and cheese and stuff my dick in your anus" kind of date?
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
When we were fucking he said and I quote "we're like a sex fajita"
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
As a gentleman, I asked her if she was sure and she just whispered "wreck me" in my ear. I took that as a green light.
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
QUICK FAX ME THE BALL
Not how faxing works at all btw
Planning a vacation around my dog. I have become one of those dog moms.
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