I'm good, just tired from chardonnay and giving hand jobs.
Thanks for stranding me with th douchebag award recipients
Redeem this text for a blowjob
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
it feels like theres a golf ball between my legs. the sex was totally worth it tho.
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
I'm not sure what happened last night, but my turtle seems afraid of me.
I almost stepped in a homeless mans stream of urine as he was peeing. I love this city.
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
He was saying things like "cum for me like a good girl" and "put my entire python I like to call a dick in your mouth" .. Okay I might have changed that one a bit
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
Christ I forgot how flexible you need to be for a decent sext pic. Jesus.
As your friend, who loves and cares for you, I have to be honest. I am judging you so VERY hard right now. Sorry.
Fuck this virus. We’re finally back on campus but the bars suck parties are banned sports are canceled we eat in our rooms and can’t fucking hangout with anyone. I’m tired of virtual classes and involuntary celibacy
OMG IKR! It’s not college unless we’re puking in a toilet wondering if we’re pregnant or just hungover!
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