I was too high to figure out which of the three doors would lead me to my classroom, so i sat down in the middle of the hallway and ate a twinkie.
I'm on the bus going to class. And a cop just rolled by and I got nervous because I didn't have my seatbelt on. I have to stop smoking so much weed.
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
Leaving someone plastered on a corner at 3am telling them to just scream for cock is NOT being a good wingman.
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
Some days you just pee in a stairwell and go home.
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
I have the rest of my life to settle down this is totally time for friends and pizza
Socially acceptable to sleep in a booth in the library? Its not finals but I dunno if I can make it back to south. Too drunk.
You know shits really hit the fan when you start using public bathroom air freshener spray as perfume
what? where are you?
hurry up. it's a friday night and i'm drinking in my office by myself. wearing a stewie griffin costume. the cleaning lady is judging me.
Randomize
