Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
My only downfall is that I can only take shots in twos.
Just found out I called my mom at six in the morning to ask where the bong was. I win.
Things i learned at work today: do not put mayonaise on a tattoo, it will get infected.
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
Yeah because the only thing stopping you from fucking Emma Watson is you not being a Gryffindor
I wore my Gollum shirt. It struck up a conversation AND got him staring at my boobs. That's a win-win.
Stop acting like the Lucky Charms you're feeding people is actually ecstasy.
Everything is fine, it's not hung over in here at all\n\n*Narrator* *but in fact everything was not fine*
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
Responsible things to do when you're too hungover to get out of bed: Breast self exam.
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
Randomize