She walked in the room and sighed really loudly fishing for attention. but I didn't bite cuz I don't give a fuck what's wrong with her.
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
She calls her new ritual "bed, bath, and beyond crunk". Hence why I found her passed out in my bath tub this morning.
i just found a cheeto on my floor and ate it. i might still be drunk.
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
We found a stripper pole in your closet. It seemed like a good idea. Alex will fix the hole in your wall. Sorry.
I don't know if it was his cologne or his Jesus hair, but he was much more fuckable than last time I saw him.
Now that I think about it, it may have been the 6 pitchers of beer.
High water is the most godliest tasting water in the world.
No cash. I had to buy four bowls of soup to meet the credit card limit. I'm not even upset. SO MUCH SOUP.
I think this is the rare instance where the babysitter should get sex as payment from the person being babysat plus you'll get birthday sex. It's a win-win.
There's a Japanese guy here dressed as a Viking who just screamed "wats up cocksluts" and kicked a guy in the face. come get me out of here.
Tomorrow has nothing to do with the threesome
I am the one with the vagina. I get to call it.
And then he peed in my hair
Stacy lit a fart and burn half of the couch down before we can put the Flames out. Bring your truck.
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