hey babe. i'll pick you up in my mom's car. with my mom. she has nothing to do tonight.
apparently it's okay for him to stick his dick in my mouth but not to let me have a can of diet pepsi for the road.
You named all of the cocktail shrimps and then tackled a guy for "eating Henry"
after the cops left he pulled the weed out of his ass and we smoked it
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
My professor just told me I'm living a lie and I found puke on my pants. How do you think it's going?
Bring fortys. we have the duct tape. its onnn mothafuckaaaa
Hey, you remember years ago when you told me you would give me a kidney?
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
I'm really excited to meet your new dude! But we really need to find out if he's your cousin first.
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
He was a Cher impersonator. They are the draggest of queens
So technically I made out with my second cousin this weekend... But it's by marriage and I'm adopted, so it's ok.
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