I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
we have officially lost it.
i told her my name was noah and she leans in and whispers "that makes me so wet." ive never been more thankful for the Notebook
he sent me this 10 second long video of a gorilla eating a banana on my phone. no explanation. I didn't even have his number. just. a gorilla eating a banana.
her moans were so awkward that i kept asking "what" when she'd say my name...
I tried to fuck this guy who I'm pretty sure has an erectile dysfunction
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
im actually so stoned and hungover i feel like a bag of jello stuffed into a human shape
Whatever you didn't send me pics of you topless making bacon
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
HOW THE FUCK IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THE JUNIOR HIGH STUDENT IS BETTER AT BEING AN ADULT THAN I AM!?!?
Hey I’m obsessed with Charlie Heaton from stranger things...not because he got caught at the border with coke...okay that’s a lot of it
I’M DRUNK AND EXCITED.
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