Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
He's so far in the closet he's in Narnia
you told all the 17 year old girls at the party that your mating call was "I glitter in the sun"
Does transporting jello shots count as driving with an open container?
just ran into a kid I used to hook up with while wearing his shirt. Only me. I tried to pretend like it wasn't his but it said his name on the back so I wasn't winning that.
just passed out while on hold to see if i left my debit card at the bar last night.
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
I literally just got propositioned by a sugar daddy.
OUR DREAMS ARE BEING REALIZED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I dont know what we smoked last night but I woke up and found out I started writing a book called White Trash Princess. Its the best thing Ive ever read
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
The George Foreman grill is melted. I don't know what other problems could arise.
If she "comes out" to me I guess I'll high five her. That's pretty much my response to everything these days.
I'm gonna snort this pill I found on the ground cause that's how classy I am. Watch football and eat Beef jerky. Domesticated at its finest.
but real talk, he made 1 phone call last night and had someone bring us tacos at 3am so idk I might be inlove
His dog hid my thong. Let me tell you, the last thing you want during a commando mini skirt walk of shame is lots of wind. There’s a church congregation that knows all my business
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