Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
He's like the houdini of condoms. I never even realized he put one on before we fucked. he's magical.
Last night I dipped into my beer fund to pay for groceries. SINCE WHEN ARE MY PRIORITIES SO WHACK???
I just drank til 6am then boned a 32 yr old that looks exactly like ET. Oh god.
The night started going down hill when she shot the cashier in the face with the confetti gun we bought at 711.
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
Nobody has ever asked me for my honest opinion on whether they needed anal bleaching before
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
You should have. Partying with 60 year olds and batman is so much better than partying with bitches our age.
We fucked like animals and then decided we actually liked each other so then we made love. It's a match made in heaven.
You were so drunk you coat checked your shoe... Not even both of them. Just one shoe.
I made out with a guy dressed as the pdx airport carpet.
Portlandia didn't prepare you for that?
Woke up to find my underwear in my purse to only remember I took them off at the airport
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