she looked like the before picture.
Please dont jizz on my ds screen.
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
I just learned you can mail a coconut. I'll be over in 3 days with the rum.
Last night must have been awesome, my dog still smells like vomit.
Just stole a goat. Bringing it to your house to cock block. Blame the goat not me.
I asked her to make me water, which in turn meant get me a glass. She handed me a cup of microwaved ice cubes.
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
How the fuck did I get back? Last thing I remember is being on some hot guy's shoulders yelling at girls shaking their asses
We'll talk about it later...
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
Randomize
