Did you know Kal Penn works at the white house? That's almost white castle.
If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.
Just saw a picture of your new tub, cant wait to pee in it
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
Apparently she came home completely covered in mud, pretending to be a bird...and she still had more sex than any of us this weekend.
all i remember is him tryin to explain to the girls how to effectively hit the strip club with their bfs
hes actually pretty persuasive when he drinks
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
I'm just gonna yell "SURPRISE ME" and see what happens. No way this could go wrong
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
I'm going to get high and eat ice cream until the pain goes away. You're welcome to join.
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
Last night I went outside to our neighbors and asked them to put in money with me to get a hot tub for our patio. Niceeeee
He just ate a tooth whitening strip...
He stole one of my good bras again. If I'm not getting laid I'm not putting with this shit. Also it's a walk of shame for you today, my car is suicidal again.
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
Randomize
