He lasted like 30 seconds. With a condom. I just expected more from the president of a frat.
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
Maybe there is a secret pocket full of cocaine in that spiderman wallet.
I'm gonna tie him up and fart in that pathetic excuse for a mustache
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
I forgot to ask you how long you're housesitting. By which I mean how many bones can I get in averaging 2.5 bones per day.
20.
We fucked so hard and loud that the everyone at the party downstairs starting chanting his name. Oh I we broke a lamp.
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
Do you know how many guys' fantasies I've been told I'm a part of lately?!
Just 2. But still.
The only joy I have here is being able to shit with the door open.
I should be rewarded with oreos for not turning into a raging cunt.
Take home message: SPERM IS EVIL AND SHOULD NEVER EVER EVER BE ALLOWED UP ONE'S NOSE.
I swear if you laugh while im moaning i will immediately stop and go home.
I'm not gonna lie. I need sex like plants need water right now. I just need the dick.
Randomize
