I'm like a rollypolly, I only open my legs up when I feel safe.
Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
Next time, if you wake and bake, make sure you nail the wake part. Not easy to explain to mum. Or the fire brigade.
His texts read Like a 15 year olds diary.
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
He is the one I "technically" lost my virginity to.
I feel like you never had a virginity..
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
He shit in a sock dude, you can't come back from that
Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.
I believe they call that patchouli.
Sometimes the gods of alcohol choose to take you on a mysterious journey and you just have to go with it
And then you refused to pee in anything but a sink
I found the crust to my pizza under my covers that's cool
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
I shouldn't be allowed to be in america for NYE... or any major holiday for that matter
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
Randomize
