Sometimes I wonder if we could be friends if we lived closer.
Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
I hope he's okay, but I also hope he shows up with an eyepatch
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
My hickies are dark enough that I can feel drivers judging me from across an intersection
Was behind a guy going 20 for 4 miles I'll be there as soon as the universe quits fucking me
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
Idk I saw a cheetah print onesie and it reminded me of your Lion King fantasy.
Once someone takes a shit in your toilet they are no longer a guest.
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
I didn’t eat all day. Got really drunk at a bruins game and puked in a random dunkies cup on the T
If that doesn’t scream I’m from New England, I don’t know what does
Randomize
