Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
just come out here and I will go home with you...
So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
i blame lastnights decisions on friday the 13th
I just took a shower and I feel like 20 pounds of sex just came off of me.
he is allergic to cats. we can only glue dog hair on him. otherwise he might die and i dont want to be responsible for that.
ahaha ok
let's call it "werewolfing"
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
Haha keeping the dream alive until Chinese New Year. I'm jobless with stitches in my face.
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
My sheer presence has sent the hipsters running in terror. I expect no problems.
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
I have standards. Maybe not when it comes to men.. but definitely when it comes to sex
Question: the touchscreen on my phone randomly quit working, do you think this could be a latent reaction from me peeing on my phone last weekend?
Pro tip: When you spend the afternoon banging your boss, don’t meet your mother-in-law for dinner if you still smell like cum and watermelon flavored lube
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Randomize
