Dude, I'm so high in the forest and I think I'm in a bear den.
i kinda do this "flirt with girls and pretend to be a hot white guy named chris" thing
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
I love how I just got my coachella ticket and ecstasy in a package deal.
She gave him a lap dance on the glass table. You can guess how that ended
So his "youporn" cam totally caught me stealing quesadilla leftovers.
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
Bunch of Navy warships just sailed into New York Harbor for Fleet Week. Nobodys getting laid this weekend.
I no longer exist. I have transformed into a puddle of sex.
When he saw my tits he said "wow you should be proud.
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
I think we have some hyper-understanding of each other when drunk, because looking back at our text convo from last night, they were literally just jumbled letters.
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
So. Much. Porn.
Randomize
