I wannas sexs uuuuu
i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
i found the vodka. it was hiding in the orange juice.
Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
We agreed to not shave eyebrows when someone is passed out. douchebag.
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
I swallowed for you. Answer the phone.
I hope your perfect outfit is a slutty power rangers outfit. That's been my dream wedding since I was a kid.
there's a guy in the del taco parking lot doing pushups. let's be his friends
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
He added me on LinkedIn while I was baking weed brownies in the boxers he left here... Is this adulthood?
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
ONE DAY CAN WE PLEASE HAVE SECRET SEX. PREFERABLY IN AN ANCIENT PYRAMID BUT I'M NOT OPPOSED TO A 4 STAR HOTEL
All I recall is being at the strip club doing dark rum shots and then puking a question mark on the wall above the garbage can in the men's room and having diarrhea in the sink. 6th drunkest I've ever been without blacking out.
Randomize