He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
I'm a big fan of your penis but I will not sit through an animated movie dedicated to it.
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
I was like a migrating bird last night. Navigating on pure instinct. Don't remember how... but I made it home.
Been in bed for 16 hours. Haven't eaten in 18 hours. Haven't pissed in almost 20 hours. Fuck you Stacey and your former reign as laziest bitch. I got the title now.
For our final psych experiment, we're conditioning Tim to hump the nearest inanimate object and/or person every time he hears a Ke$ha song
First of all you're supposed to say "you're not fat". And second of all never ever deprive me of nachos.
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
No I did not just post a Craigslist ad for a used stripper pole because I can't afford my own. But now that you put the idea in my head I might have to.
YOU IS KIND. YOU IS SMART. YOU IS IMPORTANT. YOU IS CLEANING YOUR OWN VOMIT.
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST
god i just can't wait for finals to end so i can just masturbate all day and night
Omg. I'm living macklemores best life. I have someone's granddads dog, I'm about to have someone's grandmas car. I look incredible.
Randomize
