he smells like the inside of heather mills' fake leg
ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
After he proceded to violently molest my tits until 9 am i snuck out of his room only to meet his mother downstairs, who informed me she heard the giant sexfest going on in the room next to them.. this was before she called us both "chickenshits".. worst walk of shame ever.
They just gave us root beer floats. I guess I won't quit my job today.
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
So currently I have a block of cheese duct taped to my air conditioner in lieu of a fridge.
I'm slightly possesive over the gucamole when i'm stoned.
Is that why you left peanut shells in my bed?
my revenge plans when i'm high are never as good as i think they are
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
I was grossed out that all their candles smelled like vagina and then I remembered where my fingers had been.
I texted him a series of texts in which the first letters of each text spelled out "WE SHOULD HAVE SEX". If that's not dedication to the dick, I don't know what is
The struggle bus crashed, rolled down a mountain, and went on fire, and I was on it ugh.
I pulled you and a keg around in a wagon for like five hours and apparently everyone else remembers it but us.
Just had a flashback of scottish man yellin' at my face. What the fuck I did?
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
They left me at home... I'm a liability
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