I just blew up the bathroom at work and now I feel like a new woman
Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.
you can feel better about your life now. i slept with a guy who has gold teeth
I realize now that I left my pants on that table in the downstairs bathroom at you house on Tuesday....
You called yourself Captain Aspirin and then tried to cure my headache by shoving pills up my nose. Fuck you becoming a nurse, you can't take care of me while you're drunk ever again. Ever.
Fire alarms went off at reception of gay wedding im at. We all had to evacuate until FD got here. Then...ill just text the photos.
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
I think your high point was when the quesadilla was in your mouth and you were screaming "I can't chew!" and the Taco Bell guy just kinda stared at you like he wanted to strangle.
I made out with a dude last night who has an ex wife. Is this what post grad life is about?
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
I was alternating between saying "yall need Jesus" and "God bless" the entire night
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
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