Apparently I'm the guy that didn't get the memo that Afliction and wifebeaters were the proper attire for tonight... so I'll just sit here alone in my sweatervest and be judged.
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
i wanna give whoever invented massage chairs a blow job.
Apparently campus cops frown on lighting a joint off of the eternal flame on Jerry Falwell's grave...
So you get idea of what my night was like, I woke up this morning and the back of my head was orange
(This is the second time ive been high enough to decide to run for office)
I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock
Your smile makes me feel like I'm frolicking through a field of gummy bears.
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
You were passed out in the OutBack Bowl Shrimp costume and when we asked you wtf happened you just said On Wisconsin.
This was the fourth year in a row I got arrested at Pride. Pretty sure that qualifies me as a legend.
If a cop comes up to me I'm whipping out my cock, swinging it around and singing the national anthem
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
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