I woke up this morning with my shirt on upside down.
You mean inside out.
No, upside down. I ripped the neck hole in the process of getting it around my waist.
How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
Going back to college after four years is reminding me why i love cheating... they dont let me cheat on tests but they sure try hard to make me cheat on my girl
they just dont make restraining orders like they used to.
how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
Too many sundays start with me waking up still drunk in my car.
Would it be out of line to take a picture of all the earrings, rings, hairclips, and other miscellaneous girl items that I found under my bed and post it on facebook and tag all the girls that I slept with this year so they can claim their shit and get it out of my house?
Nobody knows who they are, but they have an ice luge so they are welcome in my book
Am I supposed to confront my 52-year-old boss/mother of 3 about the fact that we matched on Tinder?
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
..and by hang out i don't mean fucking then going back home i mean let's get something to eat & watch a movie and fuck sometime in between.
cinco de mayo stole my toenail
cinco de mayo stole my virginity.
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
