come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
hey is it cool if i invite some fat girls to the party so i can be the skinny one?
yeah okay. but if i take one home with me you have to come over in the morning and tell her to get her shit and go.
I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
When i walked in, you were in bed with a hot chick rolled up in a green blanket and said you were acting like a caterpillar..
I smelled my fingers after she left and they smelt like sugar cookies. I want that one again.
Making pb&j crepes. Using corn tortillas. So high. I don't know if I'm offending French people or Mexican people more.
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
REAL PEOPLE DRINK 3 BEERS ALONE WILL WATCHING THE LIFETIME MOVIE ABOUT PRINCE WILLIAM AND KATE MIDDLETON
We are taking shots off of spoons and listening to Mary Poppins.
Things were easy when he was just a penis. Now he's a penis with feelings.
My underwear said "hard to get" on the butt. He laughed when he took them off.
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
I'm home now if you wanna come over.
Sloane just tried to lick my eyeball. I'm going to regain my composure then I'll be there.
I found myself looking up beard accounts while masturbating, I guess that's what it's come to.
Dude. So. Much. Sex. Find a girl in her 30s. Now.
Randomize
