Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
My therapist is concerned about your alcoholism.
You're getting a blowjob this afternoon. This has been your morning public service announcement.
The good news is that I can 100% reassure you that you did not get knocked up by some creepy Italian dude named Sal Manella last night.
The bad news is that you will never know the name of the guy who may have gotten you pregnant last night because he clearly gave you a fake name, sweetie.
Whore are you.
Is that a Yoda insult or are you asking me where I am?
Yes.
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
That's a gentle way of saying I passed out like an 18-year-old on his first trip to Tijuana
Yeah apparently i called the bartender a "fucking prison warden" after she took my keys and called me a cab
I have no idea what happened last night but I sobered up whilst showering with a mop.
So I wore my ankle step-counter exercise thingy while I rode him. Don't fuck him- I only burned .2 pounds.
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
Randomize