am i at home because theres a dig starrrrring at me and i dont know wit plus i haer sirens. run fast.
If there was chocolate on Regis Philban's dick, I would totally lick it off. That's how desperate I am for some right now.
Excuse me? I'm weird? You're the one sticking your penis into a pringles can.
remember earlier when I said I was over sex with random boys? take it back take it back take it back
Yeah but I get laid and I know. He drank toilet water last night and he doesn't know about that either. Still makes me happy though.
Bonus points if the penis has a little hat too
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
I had lunch with him today and quietly mourned his wasted good looks on such a disappointing set of genitals.
Hey, so, you were my "one phone call" last night... Thanks for not picking up. See, this is why I never call you.
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
I just got invited to party with a bunch of elderly lesbians I am in no position to offer life advice
HE ASKED IF I HAD SIBLINGS WHEN I ASKED HIM TO LICK MY ASSHOLE
Did you leave a mouse under my pillow again?
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
I usually do that but weve been going unprotected with tribal fertility symbols painted above my door
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