Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
you told the cop you blew a .08 because you ate poppy seeds
you went around grabbing cigarettes out of peoples mouths and claiming you were curing cancer.
I just saw at least a dozen senior citizens on roller blades. way to drunk for this.
Its like everytime i see you, my vagina gets a heartbeat.
I am now trying to reassure her that she doesn't have a wide-set vagina. So thanks, for whatever you said.
Well at least he is okay. If you call the fetal position in my living room floor "okay"...
the first cop to show up was this girl who hooked up with our home ec teacher in high school, she knows about questionable decisions
Yeah started playing at the wedding last night, when the line. "Ludacris fills cups like DD" he starts pointing at my tits right in front of his grandparents.
Dude, I got drunk and sexted his little sister by accident
So the 25yr old smokeshow I fucked last night said "Prepare to be disappointed" as he put the condom on. I was. 40 is bullshit.
The Olympian is in my bed
I just got free tacos, you would be so proud of me.
Clarification, I got free tacos without performing any sexual favors.
i solemnly vow to never stick my penis into crazy again
I give it a week.
Randomize
