Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
Just used your umbrella as a puke sheild. Thanks man.
well when mom kept referring to my "black hole of a vagina" and how i devoured all the nuts at the party like i was a pro, i figured my stay was up.
I can't remember much about walking home last night. I think I kicked a dog.
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
I HAVE MY OWN TITS FOR THAT AND I CAN GUARANTEE THAT THEYRE MORE GLORIOUS
I can pinpoint my loss of innocence as the moment I started masturbating with my teddy bears
He fell on top of me at a party. I slept with him a week later. We've been fucking for 2 moths. Most successful relationship ever.
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
They ran out of toilet paper, so I had a girl rip down the streamers so I could wipe.
You know you're high when, "Why can't I steal the duck?!" Becomes a serious question.
Ugh. He got her for secret santa. Idk what to get. Idk what she's into.
... other people's boyfriends.
you gave me money for the cab and then walked home..
Randomize
