I puked a lego.
I love him more than I love myself. Which is a lot...Because I'm narcissistic.
i popped this huge zit on her back while she was blowing me. it was like a disgusting metaphor for what happened 30 seconds later.
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
There's a paramedic out here, what have you done?
this must be what syphilis tastes like
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
Playing nyquil pong with a cat again
I'm watching Part of Your World now and I'm crying and I feel like I'm floating right along with her. This. This right here is some drunken Disney Magic
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
it was like reliving my childhood drunk at a bar.
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
They tried to get you to drink water and all you kept shouting was, "NO MORE LIQUIDS OF *ANY* KIND."
Randomize
