I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
All I've ever wanted to do in life is right
Maybe you should learn how to spell write first
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
sticking your hands in the toilet to wash your face is not acceptable. ever. i don't care how drunk you are.
When you put it that way it sounds like my vagina is a parking garage to be monitored by security guards
Thanks for bailing me out last night guys. it's bullshit that everbeering people at bars is illegal. bitches have no sense of adventure anymore
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
You were upset that she was flirting with your boyfriend so I thought the best game plan was to show her my boobs and get her to make out with me instead. I am the greatest friend on absinthe.
I'm 99% sure I just puked glitter. Wine drunk Mondays shouldn't be a thing.
and then I said "oh, I see the price of Plan B has gone up". and the pharmacist looked at me very sadly. I was just trying to make conversation.
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
I was not drunk enough for that final.
Randomize
