how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
Wait, how do girls masturbate?
I dunno we use shower heads I guess.
..how does it fit?
mid puke you looked up at me and asked if it was your turn to sing
thankjk goddddn taco bell uis open htis lateee!
you do know it's eleven in the afternoon, right?
i don't know where i am. i made bad decisions. i think this guy is dead.
It feels wrong to have dick mouth at a family dinner.
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
I was mid-sentence and you stopped me and said, "Yeah.. for my vaginas sake, I'm gonna need you to stop talking right now."
It might be whiskey, but I view Marge and Homer Simpson as something to strive for
i just realized I haven't been laid all summer. So sad. What a waste of a perfectly good vagina.
I'm not dropping acid and watching game of thrones with you. That just sounds like a disaster waiting to happen.
Riding your boyfriend's dick for an hour then waitressing for 8 hours. Would not recommend.
Oh. Why can't it be something easy, like a punch card for blowjobs?
I hear my roommate snoring and I feel bad for his girlfriend but then I hear them having sex and I guess it all works out in the end.
I want to ride that like one of the Horsemen of the Apocalypse- with bourbon in hand and without mercy.
Randomize
