girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
had another sex dream about alec baldwin...
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
Mystery lines found in a Pyrex dish in the back of my pantry at 415 am. No recall as to it's origin. Unidentifiable taste. Obviously I'm doing them
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
I guess crabs is what I get for sleeping with my ex.
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
Get drunk. Masturbate to his picture. Fall asleep. Repeat. Fuck summer.
I told him finishing at the same time would be a long-term project. Like flipping a house. A sexual house.
I found my spirit animal in the shower. It's a sloth/bear that lives in my chest.
HE ASKED IF I HAD SIBLINGS WHEN I ASKED HIM TO LICK MY ASSHOLE
omg how embarrassing to not hear the delivery person knocking because you're singing "where are you Pizza" to the tune of "where are you christmas" too loudly
I don't know if the puke on my pants is mine or not
Coming straight to your house after the flight. If not in Federal Prison for disobeying peanut laws.
you would have been so proud of how classy i just looked at the pharmacy with my $10 off plan b coupon. so resourceful.
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