my hangover today makes thursday's feel like a bubble bath.
My life is like a Sweet Valley High book but with lots of alcohol.
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
$1 margaritas. This happy hour needs to end.
I'm deep cleaning my room right now. Not sure if it actually needs it or if I'm just trying to symbolically cleanse myself of the last 24 hours.
For future reference "I'm too drunk to come today" is an acceptable line to get out of work. I love my job
I mean...he was throwing up for almost 3 consecutive hours. I don't think there's a chance in hell that would have tasted even close to tolerable.
I threw all my money on the ground and said it was for homeless people and fell down the stairs
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
Oh, AND I met a ukulele teacher that I'd date. So there's that.
How about we just have a naked taco night instead?
I've scurried myself in your trunk come find me in the morning
Dude, someone puked in my washing machine last night, I tried turning it on to clean it...not a good idea
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