So I have exactly 420 dollars saved up in tips from the past week. I win, and I take that as a sign from god that I am allowed to use that money to buy drugs.
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
you knoww youre high when you are just as concerned as the contestants on ultimate cake off as they move their 250 lbs cake over the ramp
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
He won't let me have sex with him, but feels bad if I won't let him get me off. It is the weirdest, best, most confusing pseudo relationship I've been in.
Is it bad that my only regret is fucking on the bathroom floor and not the sink?
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
I think he offered to cook me dinner or cook me for dinner. Not really sure. Just smiled and nodded.
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
Don't ever give your dog some hamburger at midnight. Its impossible to enjoy a late night burger when your dog just threw it up all over your carpet. Gremlin rules work with dogs.
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
You rolled around on the floor, yelled about being a "half-zombie" and bit that guy on the leg who was hitting on me.
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
If you could not mention to him that I slept with his best friend, that'd be cool of you.
The fact that I made out with a twenty one year old father is kind of worrying me now. Like. This is exactly what I wasn't supposed to do in life.
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